Entry 28: Bird Retrieval
The incident in the bookstore had Louis shook (see: Entry 24). But it was also the tipping point to make him so mad, he forgot all about his fears about the Duck. Or at least… enough to forge ahead with a plan of retaliation.
Technically, it was true that Louis owed a massive debt to the Duck ever since all hope had been lost and his investigation against Kookie Banjo Jr. had collapsed. But the Duck’s consultation fee and interest rates were frankly exorbitant. Louis also thought it unfair that instead of accepting his in-good-faith offer to share the profits from his upcoming exposé about Kookie (and, indeed, the biography was now a worldwide sensation), the Duck had decided to burn an entire forest to the ground.
One thing was clear: the Duck’s reasoning abilities only extended as far as his mathematical genius. Beyond that, he was an unhinged gangster who wouldn’t hesitate to take lethal action against his enemies. Luckily, last time he had been hindered by taking on a pacifist as an ally, but knowing the Duck, he wouldn’t be making that mistake twice.
In the bookstore, the duck skaters had warned Louis he had until the end of the month to pay up. That was three weeks away. So the countdown had begun. Louis decided to stay in Sydney and create a plan of action. To do so, he needed all hands (or wings) on deck. Unfortunately, given he was lacking friends at the moment beyond Kookie and Samson, this meant relying on them for assistance.
Kookie was already with Louis for the joint book tour. Tracking down Samson was another matter. Ever since Louis had discovered Samson’s hidden artistic talent and hired him to create the cover art for his biography, Samson’s demeanour had altogether changed. He now considered himself an artiste and there was a laser-like focus in his previously googly eyes that was somehow just as unsettling. Once he had completed the cover art, Samson announced he was going on an artist’s retreat to the icy peaks of Patagonia (after all, he had missed out on Louis and Kookie’s “very similar trip” to Alaska and wanted to re-create the journey in his own style and vision – none of this was coherent to Louis).
Louis decided to recruit the eagle who had, in America, helped Kookie and himself escape from a millionaire’s ticketed aviary. Kookie was now in the eagle’s good graces after being featured in the published biography with several full-page portrait pictures. He agreed to Louis’ request to “retrieve Samson” after being contacted by mail.
It took the eagle three days to track down Samson and bring him back to Sydney. The eagle soared through an open window into the office Louis had abandoned and now re-leased. In his beak he was holding on to Samson the pigeon by the scruff of his neck. Samson looked too serene given his current situation.
“Ah, there you are! Where have you been?” Louis addressed Samson, patting the eagle on the back in a gesture of thank you.
Samson landed with a thud on the ground and straightened himself up, fixing his glasses.
“Yes I have returned – for the sake of The Café!”
“Oh yes… The Café. We have decent prospect of lifting the ban on birds,” Louis nodded, clearing his throat. The truth was, he had suggested to the eagle to convince Samson to return with the promise of “a reasonable prospect of The Café re-welcoming birds”.
Samson giggled now, “In the steely ice of the Patagonia vista, I discovered my passion for art and felt myself on a road I never knew before – to success, purpose and personal fulfillment. I realised that art is not only a joy, but a gift to be cherished, a duty to be taken seriously. I decided to take on the world and all its objects as my muse! I explored many places and established a studio in a valley between two cliff faces. Here I built an igloo of the finest proportions and hung inside many fantastical paintings from cities flooding in a blaze of red syrup to volcanoes spewing sticky bubble gum.” Samson giggled at the absurdity of these lofty thoughts, “But the truth of philosophy is, who can escape the delights of carrot cake icing?” He looked round for Kookie for validation, but Kookie was away negotiating a “business scheme”.
The eagle said gravely, “Indeed, I found this pigeon holed up in a deep valley between cliffs. Never have I seen such courage, striking out and surviving in the wilderness out of a sheer commitment to the creative impulse! Truth be told, it shocked me how quickly Samson transformed from being dignified, solemn and pure in spirit to a gluttonous pigeon looking for scraps of carrot cake, all with minimal prompting on my part.”
Samson added in a gleeful mutter, “I look forward to being welcomed at The Café with scrumptious sweets, once we have reasonable prospect of return”.
“Yes yes, well, thank you for bringing him back,” Louis said to the eagle, ushering him out of the office.
The eagle left in a huff.
Making sure he was gone, Louis clapped his wings together and turned to the cork board at the other end of the room, “Now, to business! Here is the plan, Samson…”
